Thy Will, Not Mine!
How did we get to that place, a point where we no longer recognize ourselves? We jump from one major to the next long before we set foot in the school property, skimming through the list even after we’ve completed an undergraduate program. We have so much confidence that we immediately begin picturing life in the plan we built within our minds. We knew exactly what we want from the start, we only have to plan not to fail. Our hope was not out reach, the level of excitement was convincing, but it wasn’t long before we realize that we no longer want to pursue that career. Suddenly, nothing was going according to the plan. In fact, the harder we try sometimes, the faster it derails our initial plan which, like an airplane fading in the distance, begins to vanish into thin air.
I’m in the driver seat of my life and, quite frankly, I know I have it under control, or do I? I have the perfect plan about how I imagine my life to be, only to learn that his plan prevails always. I’ve come to the realization that when I try to deviate from a path, to direct the course of my life on my own, the exact opposite occurs. Every time I realize I’ve selfishly gone a little too far on my journey, I’d take a step back for a moment just to be reminded not to make it all about me. When I proudly make plans without first seeking his guidance and consultation, I only ask that he extends his compassion and willingness to forgive if my plans conflict with his.
Acknowledging that we’re not submitting to his will when we’re not even aware of that is a challenge itself. Indications of persistence manifest in different forms, yet we choose to resist our intuition. We must not allow ourselves to get carried away, but to trade the misleading and acting appearance of being close to him for a true, actual one. We prioritize his vision when we postpone our ambitions and stop granting everyone else permission to make us build their dream. To be great up above is to go unrecognized here on earth, even when it means to allow someone’s else to take the credit. Better is work behind the scene than that which is seen publicly, for he alone truly sees the recognition (or denial) we deserve. The insatiable hunger for all that the world has to offer us could always be turned down by clinging faithfully to the tree of life, the foundation which our relationships are to be built on. There is nothing wrong with trying to pursue our desire. It is when we desperately want more for the sole purpose of personal gain that we need to be reminded that satisfaction is a lost cause if, to a certain extent, it cannot be found in what we already have.
It has been said that success is wealth. If we’ve been told that a college degree would make us successful, then let us be encouraged, let it be confirmed again, it will (as long as we hold the popular saying above to be true). But contrary to popular beliefs, that which could bring permanent satisfaction to our troubled minds cannot be bought or achieved in this world on its own. Success is defined by wisdom which isn’t measured up by wealth, nor is it taught in a classroom. For it’s far better to be happy that we fail than to fail to be happy by the things that, in reality, own us. Living in submission while walking down his narrow tunnel could be burdensome, but be hopeful; there is light at the end of it. Through us, should be reflected the pure, unadulterated love that he envisions us to be. We need to be a little less self-reliant and little more deliberate as we learn to let go, because if we want to be in control over our lives, all we simply have to do is surrender control to him.
Luke 22:42 NIV
“Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me; yet not my will, but yours be done.”
